Conscious Living, Insights, Our modern society, Sexuality, Women, Yoga

Women and Body Shame

We as women feel so much shame of our bodies, no matter how beautiful they might actually be, they will always be perceived as inadequate. This feeling of shame starts at an early age, taking examples from our closed ones, but as we grow older that same shame really impregnates in our cells and we soon completely believe that it’s who we are, we are a flaw, we are worthiness and we feel a profound guilt for not corresponding to society demands. Furthermore, we punish our bodies for their “inadequacy” with strenuous exercise routines, with several diet experiments, each one more damaging and stressful for the body than the previous one, we develop a destructive self-talk and we try to hide every piece of “imperfection” we think we have because we soon realized that having “imperfections” is not acceptable for us women, we need to be perfect, thin, radiant skin, toned body in order to be worthy of the love of others. (Crazy sh*t right? Unfortunately, it’s true, let me continue)

Believe me, coming from a eating disorder background I know what I’m talking about.

Although, how bad all this may seem, it is only the tip of the iceberg, the problem goes way beyond that. We lost touch with our bodies, for most of us our bodies it’s a IT, it’s something we took for granted and which will always provide for us, no matter how bad we treat IT. We forgot how to FEEL and because of that many unhealthy patterns and habits are developed, which will inevitable lead to some sort of disease, ache and pain in the future. Particularly for us, ladies, this is even more problematic since we are, by nature, a more receptive being, supposedly more in tune with our emotions, feelings, with our body, our sensuality and sexuality. We need to thrive and feel grounded in all these realms in order to unleash and reveal our true feminine power (which is different from the man strength, but let’s leave this for another post) and feel balanced and loved. Unfortunately, society repressed our sexuality so much that, not only we ignored completely our vaginas (yes ladies, that’s the name, say it out loud, it’s just hard the first time), but also, we feel they are a source of shame. Most women have experienced or still experience some degree of shame and guilt when they are bleeding, for most women touching their pussies is a taboo, is a no no road, they don’t access their sensuality because we were told that’s what sluts do and they don’t connect with their sexuality when they are making love. We became numb!!!

The thing is, there is a tremendous power in owning our sexuality, there is a tremendous transformative force in deepen our sexual energy and regain confidence in our bodies and, consequently, ourselves. I truly believe that, if we as women work and develop our sexual energy, honoring it profoundly, there will be no more space for shame or any other sort of negativity towards ourselves. It will no longer feel right, because you will know with your heart what a beautiful, confident, sensual and powerful goddess you truly are. Especially nowadays, when we feel that the world is changing so fast, women are called to speak up and honor their nature, but in order to be able to do it, we need to get in touch with ourselves from the core, heal all the wounds we may have, all the traumas, all the lies we have been telling ourselves from an early age. World is changing, what are we waiting for?

In all my years of Yoga and spiritual practices I always felt like something was lacking, it was all good, but the core, the spark was missing. Recently I started feeling a call to change drastically my practices and so, for instance, I’d go on my mat and instead of practicing yoga, my body would start to move with the song, like he magically knew what to do and how to do and it just felt so right, so liberating, that I surrendered completely to that, it didn’t matter to me if it wasn’t making any sense. After those experiences on the mat I came across Tantra Yoga, which I never had any interest about before, and let me tell you, it blew my mind away! What I started practicing without even knowing it had a name, was there, explained and studied, I finally found the core that was missing, the solid root for everything else. Tantra is so misunderstood today, what he truly emphasizes is the connection with the body and it encourages the exploration of the sexual energy because those guys, thousand of years ago, understood how powerful and transformative it can be!

More to come. 😊

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